Walking on My Own Path

Dear young people and my 23ish self,

First of all, I would like to express my gratitude towards you all because you have spent your valuable times to read my posts, to constantly question about things, and become a better version of yourself every single day.

I can totally resonate with all the pressure you are experiencing such as which university you should apply, what major would be a great fit for you, how to adapt to a new environment without family's support, what is the next step after graduation, etc. Sometimes, I feel jealous and disappointed in myself because I was not in the top students of the school, or attended a more popular university, or look as skinny, gorgeous, and confident as other girls. But you know what, a friend of mine told me that "I am a star, and I should shine in my own way".

We are a special and gifted individual. Your DNA and my DNA have distinct coding sequences so we should not feel ashamed of our uniqueness. I totally agree that getting a college degree is a great stepping stone for future, because they create a safe environment for students to test the water and figure out what they want in their lives; offer abundant and helpful resources for students to access; additionally, students have the benefits of 'being taught, warned, and oriented' by multiple professors. They get paid to share experience and support students to achieve our goals.

Trust me, college is a great option in life, but it is not everything. This life can not be described as a linear line, on the other hand, it is a complex and multifaceted globe. Interestingly, we all share the living condition, live on the same planet, and have so many things in common. Unfortunately, our location are varied and it might be on different half of the globe. The far distance possibly cause us to draw some assumptions about one another. Ultimately, we are human beings, we deserve to receive respect, equality and equity. For those reasons, I chose to avoid burying myself in fame and reputation. I made up my decision to attend a less popular and small college whose community is supportive, small, and intimate so that I would not have to deal with high expectations and false assumptions from family, friends, and general society. I am satisfied with my decision. I have not only learned from the academic environment, but my classmates and friends outside campus also taught me a vast of incredible things about this life. The memories and experiences that we generated together played a more crucial role in my perspectives.

Walking on my own path seems to be isolating and lonely. However, it is a 'payable and mandatory' price for being an authentic self and earning peace along with comfort. I have been dealing with negative self-talk for a long time, but I am certain that I have made appropriate decisions for myself and future. Things are not always being quantified so why do we need to follow the crowd and depress ourselves? I do not encourage you to be selfish or ignorant to push people away then become an isolated island then claim yourself 'the best', 'the only', or 'the unique creature'. On the contrary, I highly suggest that you should set a boundary and maintain balance among things. Identify your own limit and inform people about that. Don't burn yourself out and excessively exploit your energy with the purpose of being a hero to other people. Take good care of yourself first before thinking about helping other people. Walking on my own path with wisdom, confidence, and fulfillment is the goal. I hope that you will be successful with whatever target you set. Trust yourself, you can shine anytime and anywhere you desire to, and you don't have to waste your time on waiting for other people to accept or give you permission to do so.